I Think You're Missing the Point
by dhauren
Summary: Steve and Bucky don't quite get the idea behind a costume party, but Darcy is there to guide them.


A little Halloween fluff humor. Hope you enjoy!

I don't own anything but the twisted idea for this story.

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Darcy Lewis frowned at her guys.

So, okay, she was totally the luckiest girl in the world because she had not one, but _two_ hot superhero men. And normally, her only complaints were minor – would Bucky _ever_ learn to put the toilet seat down? Would Steve ever stop trying to save everyone? Would the nightmares that haunted them both ever go away? Because seriously, one or the other waking up screaming happened at least several times a week. And Darcy liked her sleep.

But this? This she could not tolerate.

She placed her hands on her hips and glared at them. "No," she said firmly. "Absolutely not."

They tried the charm thing. Bucky flashed his panty-melting smile from pre-Winter Soldier days, and Steve gave his best showgirl grin. If they thought, even for one minute, that she would cave just because they were trying so hard to be adorable, they had better think again.

"Darcy," Steve tried, with his ridiculous eyelashes and wide grin. "What? What's wrong with this?"

She stomped one booted foot, spurs jingling. Her finger snapped up to point at her guys, fringed vest fluttering around her. "No. You are not going to Stark's Halloween costume party dressed like that!"

Bucky's eyes were twinkling, and Darcy was secretly elated that he could dress as he was now. It was a step in the right direction. "C'mon doll. We'll have the best costumes there."

She shook her head, grabbing her cowgirl hat to prevent it from flying loose. "No, you guys. You cannot go to a costume party dressed as…as yourselves! You just can't!"

Steve was wearing his Captain America uniform, and Bucky was dressed as the Winter Soldier. And while they both looked fantastic, and no one else would look as good, she wasn't going to let them take the job to a party. They needed to be someone else for the night, and she told them as much.

Steve wilted visibly. "I don't….I don't know what else to be." He looked toward Bucky, and both of them turned back to Darcy, with those lost little boy expressions that reduced her to a misty eyed mess.

"Don't do the little lost boys thing with me," she grumbled at them. "And get out of those uniforms! We'll find….something else."

She turned from them and began pulling articles of clothing and accessories from the closet and dressers, haphazardly tossing what she liked on their bed and things she couldn't use on the floor. After she had a suitable pile, she turned to look at it, trying to figure out what her boys could dress up as. Tapping one thoughtful finger against her chin, Darcy glanced back up at her men, and felt her knees grow weak. Oh….my.

Bucky and Steve had taken her command literally and stripped out of their uniforms. She hadn't realized they were both going commando, and the sight that greeted her was enough to make her want to stay home tonight. Because really? What girl wouldn't want to ditch a party when she had two very fine bodies (and minds!) to keep her company?

She could not help the appreciative sigh that left her mouth, and tucked her bottom lip between her teeth while she just soaked in the sight.

Bucky would probably always be less body conscious than Steve. He smirked slightly when he caught Darcy's eye, then proceeded to flex every muscle on his body. While he didn't have Steve's ridiculous build, he was leanly muscled, more like a regular human being than a super soldier and damn could that body do some amazing things.

Steve had the super soldier body, and it was completely unfair to anyone who looked at it. It was just wrong that his personality was even better than the body.

"Ohmigod you guys," she whispered. "You can't get naked and expect me to still want to go to Stark's party."

"We could skip it," Steve suggested. Then he sighed. "No we can't. If we don't make an appearance, Tony will send someone after us."

Bucky shrugged, completely and totally aware of every part of his body (naked body!) that moved when he did so. "So we make an appearance. We can't go as ourselves. So let's go as something completely outrageous to embarrass Stark so we can leave as soon as possible."

Darcy choked back a laugh. She knew just what to do!

In less than an hour, Bucky was dressed as a school girl, with pig tails, skirt and white knee high stockings Darcy had been able to do some very quick alterations on some of her old clothes so that he could wear them. He had been totally cooperative, even when Darcy applied blush, lipstick and eye shadow to complete his look. Two months ago, he wouldn't have been able to let go of his darkness and embrace the silliness of the costume, but he'd come a long way.

Steve was a nerd, complete with slicked down hair, button up shirt, dark framed glasses, and a pocket protector. It would have worked much better with his pre-serum body, but he almost looked like a blond Clark Kent. Darcy even added an ink stain.

She surveyed her handiwork proudly. "You guys look great! Bucky, you totally made my night. Steve…you're such a nerd."

Arm in arm in arm, they departed for Stark's party.

And if Clint dropped his drink and howled with laughter when he saw them, well that was just a plus.


End file.
